Mini Marth & Wumbo Warth
by 69MegaBites
Summary: Marth is sick and tired of Mario flaunting and gloating about his Amiibo partner. He's gone out of control and is a nuisance to everyone. So Marth decides to buy his own and put Mario in his place, but things don't turn out quite right. Somehow the Amiibos are alive and this does not make Marth happy because now he has to deal with a miniature version of himself and possibly doom.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:**** The first story of this account, which I am sharing with my lovely broster, Phantom Nini! We both had this account for a couple of months, but have not posted anything until now. This is crack-ish story inspired by the horribly made Marth Amiibo. Like seriously, why did they screw him up so badly. ;-;**

**Anyways, here's the first story on the account and when Nini and me get shit done, we'll post more shit and maybe more crack. Prepare yourself because I'm ****really**** feeling it. **

**Disclaimer:**

_I don't own Nintendo and everything I reference is rightly owned by its respective owners._

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There comes a day when you feel like you should give up on society and the whole humanity crap; this is one of those days. Ever since those 'Amiibo' characters came out, some of the smashers in this household may have been flaunting the figurine around. That someone, Mario.

Oh that fire-balling plumber, is despicable mustache mocks at my smooth, baby-face upper lip. Even his Amiibo portrays him with a fireball... Those bastards...

Whenever we get into battle and Mario is on his last life, he slams that damned figurine on the Wii-U and that thing... That thing kicks ass. Worst part of him winning is his laughter. Boy, that laughter is etched under my skin where I can't scratch it out. It's a god awful laughter and gloating which shoves everyone away, but Peach.

I have no problem with Peach, in fact, we have tea together along with the other princesses and goddess. She's a charming lady, and a sweet one at it too. It makes me wonder, how the hell did she end up with Mario? Maybe it's that 'knight in shining armor' thing that women are so into. Well, whatever it is, poor soul.

Sad thing is that she was the first one to witness this arrogant behavior Mario displays while playing games. She pulled out her little Peach Amiibo and fought against Mario and his 'spawn of Satan'. Note that she isn't a competitive fighter. Everyone knows she's not a competitive fighter. This whole match was for the two of them to get along... That was half right.

Obviously Peach threw the match and was about to throw her arms around Mario until he laughed that acursed laughter. He jumped up on the couch and hugged his amiibo, jumping and dancing around and using very profane language. Poor Peach didn't know what to do and just sat there, getting verbally abused by her boyfriend. Let's just say they put that incident under the carpet and are still together.

Now I on the other hand, I was given the honor of having an amiibo modeled after my greatness. The lovely people of Nintendo had shipped me their fantastic and gorgeous model to me. Lucina and Ike were there when I unboxed that beauty.

Now, I wasn't actually fond of these amiibos, mainly the reason was because of Mario. So when I unboxed that fabulous me out of the box, I wasn't so happy about it. Ike was joking about it, saying it looked manlier than me by looking more female. I can't reason with that kind of logic.

On the other hand, I noticed Lucina was eyeing that figure as a puppy would loll its tongue and wag its tail to a delicious, squeaky toy. At this moment, I decided to ask her if she wanted to keep this amiibo. Before I could form the words out of my mouth, she snatched the amiibo from me and cooed at it, naming that figure, Mini Marth.

Ike chuckled at the sight and I was weirded it out. Lucina always has this stoic and cool personality around other people, but when she is with me, well... She starts fangirling. Female Robin took this chance to appear and scold me for giving Lucina the figurine. I just shrugged. There's no way I'm getting it back now.

I regret that decision now. Oddly enough, the smashers started taking an interest to these amiibo figurines, even though there's a few out. Ike was excitedly waiting for his figurine, most of the female smashers were too, probably so they can own that fine piece of meat. I'm talking about arms. Those buff, menacing arms...

Anyways, Bowser has obtained a figurine of himself and Peach. He probably plays with them and makes the kiss, but he always objects to this and says that Bowser Jr. commits those heinous crime. The younger denies those accusations and puts the blame on his father which he also denies.

Samus and Zero-suit Samus have obtained a figurine of herself. Both of them have their own and they do both behave very differently from each other. Nintendo wasn't lying when they do have a mind on their own.

The whole point I'm trying to get to is that I do not own an amiibo. Everyone else around me either owns one or is sharing one until their own figurines come out. I am one of those losers along with Olimar. I do not want to be a loser with Olimar. Mario mocks the both of us and gloats with that hideous laughter of his. Now this is why I am at Walmart.

I finally begin this tale of woe and unfortunate events start at this magical place of food and shit people want to buy, Walmart. Being fabulous that I am, I had to disguise myself to be less fabulous, but still as fabulous. It was supposed to be a quick trip, in and out. That was the plan until I saw the fish tanks.

I couldn't help but stare at the colorful fishes. Most of them were dead, but the ones that weren't were fabulous like me. A child pulled at my sleeve and asked me where was his mother. I just shrugged and told the kid to wait for his mother where he last saw her. To my frustration, he didn't remember. I ended up walking around the whole store, looking for this kid's mom.

The kid suddenly jolted off into one direction, screaming. Confused, I turned around and saw a gigantic spider. Now you see, I'm not usually afraid of spiders, but this one was huge and hairy. It also happened to be on my shoulder. The only sensible thing I could do was to run sporadically around the clothing section, knocking down clothing and racks along the way. When I felt like I've done enough panicking, I realized what I had done. I slowly slinked away from the clothing aisles.

Well I lost the kid. He probably found his mom so I made way to the electronic's section. I examined the games they were selling and finally found the amiibos and skylander figures. Too my distaste, there were many Mario figurines on the racks. I managed to find Link and Peach and I realized there were plenty of Donkey Kongs, but what about me?

My eye caught something blue on the bottom rack. I crouched down and moved away the Mario figurines out of the way. I frowned. Why is there a skylander figure in here? I decided to get help on my search and asked the friendly woman behind the counter about the amiibos. She told me they had a lot of Mario figures and only referred them to Mario figures. I asked about the Marth figures and her face quickly contorted. "Who?"

I gave up on the woman and thanked her for not helping me at all. I went back over to the amiibos and just stared at them in disappointment. I guess my figure was very popular. I sighed and turned around towards the Xbox controllers. My eyes flashed with hope. There was a mini me among the controllers.

I quickly picked the package up and bought it without even admiring my beautiful complexion. That'll wait when I get back home to the mansion and reveal that lovely beauty. To my surprise, the kid from earlier suddenly came from the corner and hugged me. I was surprised and tried to pry him off, but he wouldn't let me go. This is getting uncomfortable. "uh.. Kid, why are you hugging me?"

"You're that Marth chick from those Mario figure thingys, right?" he asked.

I could feel my face clench up, but I forced a crooked smile, "N-no. And I think you should get back to your mom."

"Oh yeah, do you mind coming with me? My mom loves Marth and you do look like her miss, but without the dress and jewelry stuff."

I really wanted to hit that kid, but that'll be a bad image for my name. Who would look up to King Marth: The Baby Murderer? No one. That's for sure.

I didn't even get a chance to say answer the question, the kid was already dragging me to where the bikes and little cars are located. The kid brought me to a woman with long black hair and some large, rectangular, glasses. The woman frowned at her kid and placed a hand at her hip, "Marty, I told you to not wander off. Some random pedo would steal you away."

"Mommy, I found Marth." the kid replied.

"Please, Marty, there is-" her jaw dropped when she saw me. She froze like that for awhile. I gave an awkward smile, "Hi." I spoke to break the silence.

She snapped out of it and she gave a courteous smile, "Oh, sorry... Please just ignore my son if he annoyed you. He can be... Blunt."

"I see..." I don't see, I can tell. But I was brought up to be polite so I said nothing of that nature out loud.

"Mommy, that really is Marth." Marty whined, "Look! She has the-the princess tiara on her head. Look!"

"Marty! How many times do I have to tell you? Marth is a man! A very good looking, manly man!" she scolded. Well, atleast someone appreciates my manilness. Maybe I should get going. "Oh, sir."

"Yes?"

"Good, for a second I was about to say miss." she lost my respect, "but, uh... Can I take a photo with you? You really do look like Marth. Are you a cosplayer perchance?"

"I don't mind taking a photo, but I'm not a cosplayer." If she ever found out that I was really Marth, I want to see the look of her face at the realization. It would be funny. She pulled her phone out and brought her son in the picture. I put an arm around her shoulder and we both took the selfie. "Thank you for doing this. You don't know how happy this made me."

"No problem." with that, we both parted ways.

That didn't turn out so badly like I thought it would.

Feeling good from the good deed, I dropped my guard and started singing some random Hatsune Miku song, the song of my people. I didn't realize that I was slowly drawing crowd until some girl screamed one of those hideous pitched screams. My cover was blown. They recognized me.

"Shit. Shit. Shit. shit..." I muttered under my breath as I ran up and down the aisles, trying to get the rabid fangirls off my tail. I somehow managed to barely make it out alive. I ran into the woman from earlier at the register and she helped me escape by telling the fangirls I headed towards the gardening center.

I thanked the woman and quickly left to go back home.

When I walked back into the mansion, Lucina was already hovering over me. "Marth, where have you been? We were starting to get worried about you- what's that?" she pointed at the Walmart bag.

"This Lucina," I pulled out the amiibo, "is my amiibo."

"It's... it's very interesting." she looked like she was about to laugh.

I frowned, why is she trying hard to not laugh? Before I could say anything, I heard Link and Ike's laughter. "What so funny!?" I felt offended.

"Your face!" Ike nearly died.

At this, Lucina busted into laughter as well. "I don't see what's so funny about my face. Anyways where are you two so I can kill you?"

"Just look at the amiibo!" Ike chortled.

"Why? I already seen one of my figurines before and they made me look fabulous..." What the hell am I looking at? This little figure had eyes that were misplaced and a little straight line for a mouth. It also did look slightly larger than the original, especially the hair. The hair was big on the back and this little Marth also had a rounded, flimsy sword and his right arm also looked flimsy. How was this thing supposed to kill with a rounded sword?

I stared at the thing in silence while the three continued laughing. No one is going to take me seriously with this. I groaned, "Shit! I can't return this since I got kicked out of Walmart!" I am forever stuck with this deformed me, who could possibly love this thing?

"Marth," Lucina seemed to have calmed down a bit, "I really think you should keep it. You do want to kick Mario's ass, right?"

My descendant knows me so well. "Fine, but I won't like it."

"Mini Marth would!" Lucina smiled.

"Hey Marth." Ike chuckled.

"What!?" I growled impatiently.

"You should definitely name yours Wumbo Warth." Ike and Link bursted into laughter yet again.

"Hilarious." my voice dripped sarcasm. A sigh escaped my lips. No one is ever going to take me seriously again. I kicked the wall and the two laughing idiots became two screaming idiots and fell straight on their stomachs. I grinned as they writhed in pain.

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**AN:**** If you believe hard enough, you can achieve anything! At the same time, if you believe hard enough, there is still a huge chance of you failing because you're not actually trying. :)**

**I totally made Samus into two different people because I can and i'm going off of the 3DS roster. Also, I created this without Nini being aware so she has no idea I made this or what this is about lol, so there might be some grammar problems in there, but she'll clean it up... eventually. ;)**

**Until I get shit typed,**

_**ikikurface**_


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:**** Christmas is this Thursday. I doubt I get the third chapter typed by then so Merry Early Christmas! **

**Warning:**

**Some amiibo angst. (Christmas Spirit much?)**

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I looked up from my reading and all I could see is that accursed amiibo staring at me. Well, I don't know if its actually staring at me or not due to one eye looking one way and the other eye in a different direction. But it as facing me so I assumed it was looking directly at me. I set my book on the coffee table and looked out the open window. I had enough of that thing staring at me.

I felt a cool breeze hit my face, carrying the voices of Ike and the female Robin. They're probably playing a game in the dirt. We live in the Fire Emblem world that Master-hand created for us; I don't see why he won't give us common household appliances like a fridge or microwave. If we wanted to use said apppliances, then we had to cross the bridge to the Super Smash Bros. world where everything is.

But our little world isn't so bad, it's comforting, but can make you a little homesick. It's not a bad feeling though and I am quite happy to be here. I heard knocking at the castle door. Sometimes the door would get stuck because someone of the name Ike tried to break it down and also tried to repair it. I got up and walked over and opened it to Lucina.

"Hey Marth, have you used Wumbo Warth yet?" Lucina asked.

"No, not yet."

"You need to! Mario is still being jerky." Lucina frowned.

"You have your own amiibo, why don't you shut him up?"

"Well, you see..." Lucina rubbed the back of her neck.

"He beat you, and gloated, didn't he?"

"Yeeaaah..." Lucina slowly admitted, "But everyone is counting on you! It's your destiny to fufill this prophecy and kick Mario's ass with your prophet, Wumbo Warth! The fate of our sanity is resting on your hands!" she waved her arms around the air to emphasize her words.

"Okay Lucina, you're overly exaggerating on that stuff. First of all, I really don't care. Secondly, I have never used that thing so if I were to challenge Mario right now, he will still beat me."

"But Marth...!" Lucina whined, "That's why you train him!"

"No, Lucina." I said firmly, "I refuse to be seen with that thing."

"Fine." Lucina pouted, "But Mario has been talking smack about you. Like how you look like a girl and apparently wear women's panties."

My face blushed furiously. That damn Mario! That only happened one time and I was too drunk to remember what exactly happened! Lucina saw my face and wore a smug smile. "He also told us that you secretly watch yaoi..." with that, she walked off.

The damn Mario! He will pay for humiliating me! I stormed off towards the living room and went to retrieve my amiibo from the shelf. Until I then realized it was gone. I froze for a second and immediately started looking for it. Where the heck did it go?

I groaned and gave up on my search inside the living room. It's time to interrogate Ike and female Robin. I stepped outside the castle door and was greeted by a strong breeze. I held on to my crown so it won't fly away and looked for the two swordsmen.

The grass crunched under my feet and sparse trees started to bend under the gust of wind. It makes me wonder if we are experiencing a tornado, but there's not a cloud in the sky. My clothing flapped wildly in the wind to my annoyance, but I didn't exactly want to lose my cape or tunic. So I merely tightened the cape around my neck and held my crown in place and continued on my search for the two swordsmen.

"Ike! Robin!" I shouted. I heard a sickening snap and looked up to see a tree wanting to glomp me. My cape caught wind and forcibly dragged me back onto my back before the tree could crush me. I was in shock. The thoughts about the amiibo were long gone now, I'm more concerned about the safety of my friends.

I stumbled onto my feet and tried to run, but it is hard to run straight when a strong force is blowing you back. "Ike! Robin!" They probably couldn't hear me due to the wind growing louder and wilder, but that didn't stop me. "Ike! Robin! Where the heck are you!?"

I spotted a figure next to a tree, an awfully large one. It could be them and with that, I made my way towards it. The wind kept catching onto my cape which in turned pulled me back. All of my attempts to get to the figure it is failing. I shielded my eyes as the wind kept growing stronger and stronger to point where I couldn't even move or hear myself think as everything seemed to be moving to rapidly.

To my surprise, the wind died a little and I looked up to see Ike who seemed relieved, but concerned. "Marth," he shouted over the wind, "It's too dangerous to be outside!"

"It wasn't this bad when I came out here!" I shouted back, "Where's Robin!?"

"Right here!" I looked down and saw Robin latched onto Ike's leg, "The wind kept lifting me up!"

"Come on Princess, latch onto my leg, we are heading home!" If we were in a different situation, I would kill Ike for saying those words in unison. However, I did need him now so his impending death will wait soon. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his left leg. He was awfully slower than normal.

"You're too slow!" I shouted.

"Sorry Sonic, try running with two people on your legs!"

"Ike, your stupid cape keeps hitting me in the face!" Robin shouted.

"The things I do for ungrateful people..." I heard Ike mutter which made me grin mischievously.

We finally reached the castle door, but to our dismay, the door was jammed again. Ike rapped the door harshly, "Open up! It's windy out here!" he shouted. We heard shuffling and footsteps coming towards the door. The door knob turned to reveal a very tired looking male Robin. He looked at us quizzally. "Why are you two on Ike's legs?"

"It was very windy outside, almost as if there was a tornado." Robin said as the two of us unlatched from Ike's legs.

"Yeah, the wind was throwing us everywhere..." I added.

"Really?" his eyes narrowed in confusion, "What wind?"

"Outside! The wind-" I pointed towards the calm setting, "Is a very light breeze now."

"hm... If I didn't know better, the Hero-King must be more feminine than I thought if a breeze like that can sweep him off his feet."

"What!?" I questioned in disdain and I could hear Ike trying hard not to laugh.

"Robin!" female Robin frowned in disdain.

"Hey, I said if I didn't know any better." he turned around and walked towards his room, "I'm going back to bed. Don't bother me."

As soon as he was out of earshot, female Robin sighed, "I wonder what's wrong with him. He wasn't like this before when we first got here."

"Maybe its just stress?" Ike suggested, "The tournament is stressful."

"Whatever it is, there's no excuse for making fun of me like that." I frowned. What's wrong with male Robin? He used to be more gentle and kind before. Maybe things are just getting into his head. I sighed. I'll let him slide this time. "Oh, by the way, have you two seen my amiibo?"

"You mean Wumbo Warth? Didn't you leave him on the bookshelf?" Ike said.

"I checked there, but it's gone."

"Well, he couldn't have got and walked away. You could of left him in your room without knowing." Robin suggested. "That happens to me sometimes."

"... Okay, then. I'll check there." I highly doubt it.

"Shit, I just remembered Jigglypuff and me have a match with Kirby and Olimar!" Ike ran out of the castle.

"I'm actually curious about how that's goinng to turn out. Do you want to watch with me?" female Robin asked.

"Nah... I'm going to try and train my amiibo so Mario can shut up for once."

"Okay then. See you later." Robin walked out of the castle.

"Now to find that little thing." I climbed up the stairs, avoiding to look at the messy living room and proceeded to my room. I did hear strange noises coming from the Robin's room, but I've heard it long enough that it has become the new normal so I walked passed it without a second glance. A few doors down, I passed by Ike's room which smelled horrible, even with the door closed. My room was a door away and Lucina was right next to mine.

I opened my door to my neatly, organized room. I looked on my desk and bookshelf, but it just wasn't there. "Where are you Wumbo Warth? Goddamnit, now I'm saying it!" I groaned in frustration. In self agony, I flopped on my bed, ready to give on life until I felt something pricked my back. I sat up and grabbed what was underneath me; a rumbled piece of paper.

I unraveled the note and revealed poorly written words. It was actually pretty hard to read.

_**"Hai marth**_

_**ey ben heidng sumhare u feid i no**_

_**scret!**_

_**hrad 2 warite luk im**_

_**4 2 1 rum tuuuu!**_

_**Mash Mash Mashion!**_

_**o luk uunder bed no!**_

_**no no nonono!**_

_**ey leik u! nononono!**_

_**meigec scuary hesh scruary!**_

_**eth behth kellulok..."**_

_The writting became rush and close together to where it was unreadable._

I tried to make sense out of this letter, but it was hard to decipher anything with this poor handwriting. Whoever wrote this was either in a rush or was really scared about something. I set the letter down on the bed stand and dropped my cape on the floor; it really was bothering me now.

I heard the red emblem on my cloak clink onto something. Shit, I think I hit something important. I tugged on my cloak and felt something move underneath my bed. I lowered myself and felt under my bed, surely enough I grabbed something plastic. I pulled it out and sighed; it was my amiibo.

It was hard trying not to look at those imperfections, but I ended up staring at them. Who could possibly take this thing seriously in battle? I heard footsteps running up the stairs and then my door slammed open by a panicked looking Lucina. "Marth! A bomb went off in the tournament!"

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**AN:**** Shit just got real. What's happening? Is it possible to understand the letter? Is everything connected somehow or is Lucina trying to plan something? No one but me knows the answer.**

**This is also not a good cliffhanger, but oh well.**

**Until I get shit typed,**

_**ikikurface**_


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